This is definitely one of those “one of a kind posts” but after hearing so much lately about people talking to their younger selves and giving them advice, I found it interesting. Too bad when we were younger and if we were going through a very challenging time, we could not hear what our older selves would be telling us things pass. However, if I were to talk to my 13 year old very depressed self, wondering if anyone would ever like me (junior high was one of the worst times of my life)- I would certainly have some advice for her.
What would I tell her? Firstly, yes, people will like you and there will unfortunately be people who will not like you, it is part of life. However, being picked on endlessly will not last forever (I thought it would never end like so many kids who were bullied). You will have some better times ahead, but be prepared to go through some challenges but the good news is, you will get through it. And remember that these challenges are not here to purposely make you miserable. They are there to help you find it within you to work with it and to make a better life for yourself. I am currently really learning this now. But in order to be liked, you have to like yourself and value yourself which is something I am also learning now. And you will also have to learn to stand up for yourself and your rights so those who don’t like you will immediately leave you alone. I know right now you believe you deserve nothing but the short end of the stick, and the worst that life can possibly offer. But that is not the case, as you deserve to be happy like anyone. The worst possible thing you can do is give up hope. Things may be very bad but there is always a light at the end of the tunnel and just remember that. There are plenty of things ahead to look forward to as well, so hang in there (and by the way, one of those girls harassing you is actually a criminal now and is in prison, and believe it or not, the other girl harassing you will not even remember who you are and you happen to become very good friends with her sister).
I have to admit something. Even though I am doing my best to take that advice even now, I wish I could meet myself 20 years older now telling me that the things I worry about now are not going to happen. Then again, what if something that I do worry about does happen? Perhaps I am better off just not knowing. Or a version of myself 20 years older could even give wiser advice.
However, instead of getting lost in too many worries, the best thing to do is just do your best, and focus on those things that are truly important and you will know what they are. I am not talking about wanting to impress someone or make a lot of money for superficial reasons. But if you have goals and dreams you want to reach and see them become a reality, focus on that. If it is meant to be, it will happen. And that is the current me, telling myself this now, and telling others in the same boat.
I have thought about doing this myself. When I was younger, I worried about everything and anything. What I worried about did not happen. I wish I could have told myself back then to calm down.
I would have a lot to say to my younger self. That is for certain. It would be “how could you be so stupid?”. Ugh.
I wonder what my older self would tell me. Wonder if I will ever get wiser as I get older. Sometimes I worry about the same stuff as I did when I was a teenager.
I tend to wonder if I would have listened to myself as I am now, back then. I was one of those know-it-alls until a life altering experience basically changed me.
I wonder if I have learned anything since I was a teenager. I still find myself making the same dumb mistakes. It is time I start learning now, and have a talk with an older version of myself to give me wisdom.
I doubt my younger self would have listened to my older self.